As a marketer and business coach, I’m no stranger to the concept of “finding your why”.
Knowing what’s underneath the surface of your goals makes a huge difference in your success with them.
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
— Friedrich Nietzsche
Everyone has a WHY. Everyone has a purpose, cause or belief that inspires you.
Knowing your WHY gives you a filter to make choices, everywhere in your life, that will lead you to reach the places you want to go.
How to get there: From skin to heart
Most lessons will coach you to go 3 to 4 levels deep.
Doing this exercise can take you from something as surface level as:
“I want to make more money”
and switch it to:
“Having the freedom to spend quality time with my family and not missing out on important events.”
We can be much more motivated when we act from the deepest levels of our core desire.
As I mentioned before I have enrolled in the 52 WEEKS OF MOMENTUMcourse led by my favorite writer, motivational psychologist Benjamin P. Hardy. We were required to write out top 5 goals for 2018, and as expected, we had to do an exercise to unveil our “why’s”
Deep Space 7
But I was taken off guard when we were asked to go SEVEN levels deep!
Like wha? Overkill much?
In the past I found myself stuck at the 3rd “Why?”
Finding my answer somewhere near: “Well, because, that’s why, dammit!”
So to say I was intimidated is an understatement.
This time Benjamin P. Hardy offered a simple switch that changed everything.
“Why is that important to you?”
Why is that important to you?
Switching from “why?” to “why is that important to you?” changes the game. It tweaks the question just enough to make it answerable. It feels like a real inquiry rather than an annoyingly persistent 7 year old wanting to see how quickly they can break you.
Let’s check it out in action:
I want to make money. Why is that important to you?(1)
Because it will allow me freedom. Why is that important to you?(2)
Then I can spend more time with my family. Why is that important to you?(3)
So I can be more involved in their lives and not always working. Why is that important to you?(4)
Because I want my son to have a healthy relationship with his parents. Why is that important to you? (5)
So he can feel loved, supported and invested in. Why is that important to you?(6)
So he has a strong foundation of safety, trust and security. Why is that important to you?(7)
So he can become a secure, confident, loving adult and pass on these traits to those around him and/or his children.
See what we did there?
“I want to make more money so my son can become a secure, confident, loving adult and pass these traits onto others.”
From skin to heart. We uncovered a motivation at one of it’s deepest levels. Something worth fighting for. Something life changing to work towards. This discovery makes a money goal feel pretty damn noble.
Wanna try it?
Write your top 5 goals for this year.
WHAT exactly is the goal?
HOW will this goal be measured?
WHEN will the goal be accomplished?
Now that we have a clear picture of the goal, sart the “7 Step Why” process.
WHY is that important to me? Seven times.
Now that you’ve uncovered your true motivation you can ask:
What is currently stopping me from meeting that goal?
What will I do to make this goal attainable?
I promise that taking this step will make an exponential difference in the success of your goals. This exercise will give your dreams inspiration and momentum. You can use the worksheet below to get you started. Try it out and let me know what you think.